TAR: Pole position

What a strange episode that was. The pacing was off as it was obviously meant to be Part 1 of a two-parter, the Roadblock was MIA (where's the CSI when you need it?), and for the first time ever, we got to see teams setting off from the Pit Stop twice in one episode.

The strangest thing was that it was on a Monday, something as unnatural as a dog standing on its hind legs, or a straight Cha, or an interesting Dani(elle). I don't like this new timeslot, especially since it cuts into my 'America's Next Top Model' time. Do you know how hard it is to write about 'TAR' when you have Ms Tyra in the background distracting you with her day-glo hair?

Bill and Joe have a habit of falling hours and hours behind other teams. In their first season, they ended up falling so far back, they had to be informed that the race was over while they were still stuck on a glacier in Alaska. But Bill and Joe need not worry as I'm sure this time it will end differently. Poland has no glaciers for one thing.

Their 12+ hour difference will probably be mitigated by a conveniently placed bunching point anyway, just like the supposed bad weather that kept Charla and Mirna's dhow from sailing last week. I look forward to learning next week of a sudden and mysterious tornado which has grounded all flights except the ones the teams don't happen to be on.

Plane in the ass

Travel just didn't agree with any of the teams, except for the BQs. I think. They may have had some bad airplane food or something. Did you know Tyra loves airplane food? Gah, I need to focus. Next I'll be comparing Jay Manuel's sparkly pecs to Eric's and complaining about how Charla's walk just isn't fierce enough.

For all our faults as a nation (crime, taxis, sokkie treffer compilations), we can be rest assured that we are not the worst place in the world when it comes to service delivery. Hands up if you’ve ever had to wait seven hours at a travel agent. So if you're ever planning on travelling to Dar es Salaam, bring a book or three.

I am convinced that the travel agent's inability to find teams tickets to Poland within the space of a workday was because of Charla and Mirna's "convincing". As soon as the Cousins started their attempts at persuasiveness, the travel agent thought "Screw these two" and ended up playing Minesweeper for the rest of the day.

OK, perhaps that's not the most convincing theory since wouldn't a travel agent want to get rid of people like Charla and Mirna as soon as possible instead of hearing all the dialects of Mirnese for seven hours?

Uchenna and Joyce completely missed their connecting flight in Frankfurt. I know I keep saying how somewhere Rob is pointing and laughing at the TV, but seriously, you know he's laughing his ass off at this one. Apparently planes only come back when it's the finale episode and the producers have an investment in making it a close race. Funny how that works.

Love is all you need (to get on a reality show)

The most fun bit of Evil Plane Business was watching the Guidos and Eric/Dani(elle) not be allowed to board their connecting flight when they were already so far behind. Joe tried to get the plane's attention by running outside and shouting at it. In most airports, that would have gotten him a taser to the head. He's lucky that security in Kilimanjaro consists of a guy with a badminton paddle and a really sharp pencil.

All this stress led to Eric and Dani(elle) fighting. Eric thought Dani(elle) was acting like a drama queen while Dani(elle) thought Eric was acting like a child. Oh noes! My heart will be broken if these two crazy kids don't make it! I haven't been this invested in a couple since Britney and Kevin!