The Rasmus were conned. When hiring Desmond Child, the Finns must have been listening to his work with Aerosmith, Bon Jovi, or Alice Cooper. Even The Scorpions or Meat Loaf. Instead they got the guy who wrote and produced songs for the Jonas Brothers, Roxette, Ricky Martin, and Michael Bolton.

So the rockers behind 'In The Shadows' now sound more like a boyband — all simpering vocals, heavily processed guitars, orchestral swells, and lyrics about last kisses, keeping love alive, and hearts made of stone.

Opener 'Livin' In A World Without You' is built around a reformed Backstreet Boys beat, 'Ghost Of Love' doesn't successfully hide its similarities with Kelly Clarkson's 'Since U Been Gone', 'Live Forever' could be sold to the next 'Idols' winner, and gradual grower 'Justify' would nestle comfortably on the latest Take That album.

Although they never did rival Slipknot in the intensity stakes, only the grinding 'You Got It Wrong', complete with (gasp!) a guitar solo, and crunchy 'The Fight' really have the band baring their teeth (a little). But even these break out into the impossibly pretty choruses Child writes in his sleep, clearly highlighting his brief from the record company: we want hits, not substance.

Once you get past how contrived it all sounds, though — not even obscured by borrowing the bombast of 'Bat Out Of Hell 3' — The Rasmus' seventh studio album has all the makings of a guilty pleasure. The gloriously gloomy 'Ten Black Roses' is a perfect pop treat and electro rocker 'Your Forgiveness' sticks in your head like an axe but overtly calculated songs-by-committee like 'Dangerous Kind' and 'Run To You' are constant reminders of how lifeless this album really is.

There's a reason roses go black — they're dead.