'The Hitcher' starts off well enough, but after 10 minutes, you soon realise that this movie is going nowhere, and you better hope you left your intellect at the door…

Based on the 1986 cult classic starring Rutger Hauer, 'The Hitcher' has so many plot-holes and ridiculously unbelievable events, it makes the original look like 'Schindler’s List' in comparison.

We begin with Jim (Zachary Knighton) and Grace (Sophia Bush) embarking on a roadtrip for Spring break and before you can say ‘roadkill’ they have almost run down the titular character. Of course, they don't pick him up — probably the only part of the movie that plays against type — but a trucker soon does, dropping him off at the same gas station as the young couple.

Why the trucker was not slashed up is anybody’s guess. But the hitcher (played by an admittedly creepy Sean Bean) only has eyes for Jim and Grace. Soon he's talked his way into their car and thus begins the killing spree. Jim boots the crazy out the car, but he keeps on coming…

Apparently he's unaffected by being tossed out of a speeding vehicle and before you know it he's hacked up a family, leaving them dying in the car.

Our hero couple stops to help, but almost get run off the road by their pursuer who has managed to find a car in the middle of the desert, minutes after dicing up the unlucky family…

Jim and Grace make it to the next town. The family dies and the kids are framed. No questions are asked. Like why would a couple of well-dressed college students suddenly go on a killing spree, and then drive the corpses into the nearest town, report the crime and tell the first person they see to call 911?

Nope, the audience is simply expected to believe that the entire police force have the collective IQ of a gerbil.

And the clichés keep on coming.

Wanna know why the killer does it? Why does he tear his way through a God-fearing family on vacation? Why does he choose this young, attractive couple to stalk across the New Mexico desert — framing them along the way?

"Why not?" utters our despicable fiend.

Please…

The best part about this movie is its running time — a mere hour and 15 minutes. I don’t think I would have lasted much longer.