Directed by Neal (HOWLING V) Sundstrom, and written by prolific local writer Gus Silber (who has also been known to read Cult de Sac), 'Slash' premiers on video in the States in May.

I have also been in touch with Kaganof (the director formerly known as Ian Kerkhof). I met him during a screening of some of his work at the National Arts Festival in Grahamstown a few years ago, and if there?s such a thing as a cult South African filmmaker, he is definitely it. At that time he was using film to raise enough money to get his T-shirt business off the ground. Fortunately he?s back in film and has won an international award for his latest incredible work. But that?s for later.

Andrew's obsession with cult films began at midnight at the age of ten, and involved a bowl of popcorn, an old television set and John Carpenter's Halloween. Little has changed since then, besides age, the popcorn and the fact that he can now climb dark stairwells after a horror movie by himself. Andrew is a published writer of horror fiction, a screenwriter and a freelance journalist. His time is spent largely in pursuit of a truly original horror film. Failing that he has threatened to make his own.

Coming up with such a list proved to be more difficult than I thought ? sure there are the usual suspects (damn, I left Kevin Spacey out) like Jack Nicholson, Nicolas Cage and Dennis Hopper. But then you have to consider whether or not blokes like Pee Wee Herman count, and does Kevin Costner rank simply for thinking 'Waterworld' would ever make money?

I?m sure my top six differs slightly or completely from yours, buy hey ? who?s writing this rubbish?

So with much drinking of wine, gnashing of teeth and scratching of cast I came up with a Top Six List of Cinematic Certifiables.

1. Dennis Hopper ? One of the busiest men in film history and also one of the most intense. Possessed performances in ?Blue Velvet? and ?The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2? are enough to earn him top honours.
2. Max Schreck ? Okay, hands up those of you who believe the guy really was Nosferatu?
3. Jack Nicholson ? arguably the candidate for most honest performances in his career ? thing is, if he?s as mad off screen as he is on, would you like to meet him in a dark alley?
4. Christopher Walken ? I?m not sure if he counts as a madman per se, but there?s definitely something not quite right about this actor.
5. Gary Oldman ? Intense, fearsome and infinitely likeable actor. Also a bit odd.
6. Nicolas Cage ? Who could forget ?Raising Arizona?? Or any film this movie stalwart has made, come to think of it?

The one thing these guys have in common (apart from uncommonly sensational performances) is that they are almost all character actors.

Thing is, what the hell does the term actually mean? I mean, you hear it bandied around and people generally just nod their head and pretend they know what it means.

WARNING: This is an educational bit!
Character actors are loosely described (I think this means that no one really wants to commit to a strict definition in case they turn out to be wrong), as someone who becomes known for the kinds of roles they play. Character actors tend to have unique mannerisms that make them instantly recognisable, which is generally what separates actors like Dennis Hopper from ooh? Britney Spears?

Dennis Hopper

Whether he?s a washed up photojournalist in the heart of darkness of Coppola?s ?Apocalypse Now? or the hardened father in ?True Romance?, Hopper always lends tremendous weight to any film he stars in. Of course, that weight threatens to upstage the cast more than acting as a ballast.

And with over 150 films to his credit he has to be one of the most prodigious talents in the business. And the only thing you can be sure of is that you?re never quite sure about him as an actor.

I had intended to delve into his history and come up with a few explanations, but why the hell would I want to do that? The insights would be glib at best. I?ve always maintained that the best approach to the monster on screen is never to give up too much information on it. You demystify it and you rob the audience of every glorious sliver of cinematic magic that character produces.

I did find many bios out there on Hopper but the one that strikes me as the most complete, but at the same time the most hopelessly inadequate, is his own. This is what Hopper, in 1980, had to say on the issue of his variegated self. I?ve ignored the typos as they may be significant. Then again they could just be typos, but his typos nonetheless?

I was born in Dodge City, Kansas on a farm in 1936. I followed the light changing on the horizon. I watched the hard rain in puddles. I collected bugs in the mornings by picking up leaves and putting them in a fruit jar with nail holes in the top. I laid in the ditch and watched the combines come along the dirt road. They were from Oklahoma. I wondered where the trains went. I shot a BB gun at the black crows. I fought the cows with a wooden sword. I hung ropes in the trees and played Tarzan. I listened to Joe Louis fight on the radio. I fed the chickens pigs, cows. I swam in the swimming pool my mother waged in Dodge. I got a telescope and looked at the sun and went blind for five days. I caught lightning bugs, lightning shows, sunsets and followed animal tracks in the snow. I had a kite. I used the telescope to burn holes in newspapers. The sun was brighter than I was. God was everywhere and I was desperate. I sniffed gasoline and saw clowns and goblins in the clouds. I was Errol Flynn and Abbott and Costello. I o.d.'ed on the gasoline and attacked my grandfather's truck with a baseball bat breaking the windshield and the headlights. I ate raw onion sandwiches in the Victory Garden. My father went to war. I drove a combine and one wayed. On my broom horse I announced the beginning of the war to the crows. I was William Tell and Paul Revere. I dug fox holes in the field and played war. I racked balls in the pool ball, smoked cigarettes, drank beer, and ate more onions. My grandfather and my grandmother Davis were my best friends. I walked on the rails on the train tracks. I shot marbles with an agate shooter. I caught catfish and carp in the river. I wondered what mountains looked like and skyscrapers. I imagined them on the Kansas horizon. At 13 I saw my first ones. They were smaller than I had imagined. So was the ocean. It was just like the horizon line on my wheatfield. I was disappointed. I had a newspaper route. I delivered the newspaper from my bicycle. I collected paper to sell. I sold empty Coke bottles for money. I never made a cent from these photos. They cost me money but it kept me alive. These are my photos. I started at 18 taking pictures. I stopped at 31. I am 50 now. These represent the years from 25-31, 1961-67. I didn't crop my photos. They are full frame natural light TriX. I went under contract to Warner Brothers at 18. I directed 'Easy Rider' at 31. I married Brooke at 25 and got a good camera and could afford to take pictures and print them. They were the only creative outlet I had for these years until 'Easy Rider'. I never carried a camera again. Thanks, Jack, for the book.

So there you have it ? the complete Hopper? Who knows ? this isn?t a psychiatrist?s basement, it?s a cult film basement, so on with the show.

The problem with Hopper is where to begin; there are just so many wonderfully possessed performances to choose from. Many will argue that ?Easy Rider? is a good example of his work. I?d disagree, largely because I can, but more sensibly because he was just too close to the film and also because the character of Billy is just too nice and naive.

Better examples of his work can be found in films like ?Blue Velvet? and, curiously enough, in ?The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Part 2?. In ?Blue Velvet? Hopper plays the role of Frank Booth, a local gangster and all-out sociopath. We are first introduced to Frank in the film against the backdrop of the severed ear storyline. Jeffrey Beaumont (Kyle MacLachlan) is hiding in the closet when Frank enters the room. Seen from the perspective of the hopelessly curious Beaumont the tension increases; as we know, Booth is a dangerous man and Beaumont is in severe danger.

Booth is an insidious, inexplicable and wildly unpredictable character who seems to prefer battery acid for his scent than a splash of Brut. He is the kind of man who would prefer to spend a night torturing someone than sitting through another episode of ?Survivor? ? but then again, who wouldn?t?

Perhaps the scariest thing about Booth is that he is real ? we know that there are men out there like him, and of course the fact that Hopper said ?I?ve got to play Frank, because I am Frank!? doesn?t help his reputation any.

One of my favourite scenes in the film is Hopper?s entrance, the gas mask and the chilling physical encounter between the nutter and Dorothy Vallens (Isabella Rossellini). A basic rule of thumb is when Booth tells you not to *&%$#&@ look at him, you really shouldn?t.

The role of Frank was considered by prospective candidates to be so repulsive that the only other actor to put up his hand for the role was Frank Loggia, who you might remember as Sallie ?The Shark? Macelli in John Landis?s unjustly underrated ?Innocent Blood?; or Eduardo Prizzi in ?Prizzi?s Honour.?

Lynch sets Frank up as all that is evil and repulsive in society, and the effect is truly disconcerting.

Personal favourite lines from Frank: "I'll send you a love letter! Straight from my heart, #@&^*@! You know what a love letter is? It's a bullet from a @#!$%^& gun, #@&^*@! You receive a love letter from me, you're %$#@^@ forever! You understand, %$#@? I'll send you straight to hell, $%#@$&!"

I also mentioned Hopper's role in ?Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2? as another good example of his prowess. Some of you may think this a little odd as it?s hardly ?Red Rock West?, and basically you would be right. The film is inherently crap, but for fans of the original it?s an irresistible bit of mayhem and fun. It also contains some beautifully shot scenes and conveys a somewhat diluted, yet similarly compelling sense of menace from the original.

Hopper plays Lieutenant ?Lefty? Enright, a former Texas marshall, on the trail of the cannibal family who carved up his nephew (who some of you might remember as the really annoying one in the wheelchair). In fact there?s a beautifully funny scene in the film where Lefty discovers the body of his nephew, still bound to the wheelchair. He has of course lost a lot of weight since 1974.

?Lefty? is not only a few steps behind the chainsaw-wielding maniacs, he?s a few inches short of being just like them. Hopper lends an intense performance to the character that, while camp a lot of the time, is nonetheless an absolute pleasure to watch. Check out the scene where he tests chainsaws as he prepares to do battle with Leatherface.

A personal favourite line from Lefty (in response to a question as to why the two kids in the opening scenes of the film are found in several large chunks): "One of those boys was so crazy he sawed his own head off going 90 miles per hour."

At the end of the day, who Hopper is in real life is important only to him and those close to him. If we ranked actors on their real-life traits and personalities there would be very few of them up there on the pedestal. Least of all actors like Peter Sellers.

We are entranced by their antics on screen, the personalities they bring forth off the busy sets with the lights, people and machinery. That is what?s so truly amazing; that is what is so frightening?.

Next Week ? Max Schreck, or how to deal with difficult directors...

?Easy Rider? is available from THE VIDEO SHOP - 13 North Park Centre, 7th Avenue, Parktown North - Tel: 011 788 8613. Email: tebaldi@mweb.co.za. With a vast range of titles, especially rare and classic films and knowledgeable staff, THE VIDEO SHOP has just what you?re looking for and is Cult de Sac?s video shop of choice.

The Cult de Sac Parting Shot

Has anyone ever declared war against Greenland? Hey I was just wondering!

Last week?s Cult de Sac Meaningless Trivia Question:

Several scenes in ?Easy Rider? were either cut or not filmed. What was the primary reason for this? Why did Captain America attract so much interest from police at the time of shooting?

ANSWER: Okay, four bikes were custom-made for the film. Unfortunately two of them were stolen and one burned out, leaving them without fairly important props for the scenes they wanted to shoot. Peter Fonda found himself in trouble because in the States there are very strict laws about how the Stars and Stripes are displayed. The flags on his jacket, helmet and petrol tank apparently didn?t quite do it for State Troopers who continually pulled him over.

This Week?s Meaningless Trivia Question:

In 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2', Hopper assists a damsel in distress clad in denim shorts. What is the name of this character and how does she wind up on the cannibals? prospective menu?

Feel free to disagree with all of the above and contact me with ideas, suggestions and abuse. I?m open to all three, although I do prefer qualified abuse.