"It's really hard for me to commit," admits Diaz. "It's probably a lack of discipline on my part."

"Honestly, I'm just a spoiled brat who's used to getting my own way all the time! I'm sure that's what it is. I'm sure I'll suffer for it later, but I'm happy with it right now." No envy here, Cameron — getting your own way only goes so far. It's kind of worth outgrowing.

So, on to grown-up things — like... Halle Berry flogging her very own celebrity perfume! I mean, scented water — what could have more to do with, you know, acting? Not much, apparently, unless it's selling a self-named clothing line like every second starlet.

No Berry Briefs or Halle Headbands in the works, but she is all set to assault our olafactory sense with Bucket o' Berries, or whatever it's called.

You can thank motherhood for the chance to spray Halle all over yourself.

"I finally had the time to do it," says the star, "and it takes a lot of time to make your own fragrance when you're really involved."

"The last movie I did was two years ago. In that time I got pregnant, had a baby — and this was my second baby." Way to make you flesh and blood feel special, Berry.

But, don't give up and think there's nothing of moment happening in the land of celebrity just now. There is something in this crazy, mixed-up world of ours worth fighting for... victory for Rick Astley.

Yes, our Rick finds himself a finalist in the Best Music Act Ever category of the MTV European Music Awards.

Others up for this bit of pop flattery? U2, Britney Spears, Christina Aguillera, Green Day and Tokio Hotel.

I dare say the selection does contain some talent, but the searing horror of the omissions in this supposed list of the best musical acts ever makes me feel the overwhelming need to see Rick take home the award. If you too believe in truth and justice, just click here to do your bit and vote for this '80s musical hero.

Astley's infectiously catchy, brainless pop is probably just what Keira Knightley needs to get her out of her lousy-review-inspired funks.

Yes, the stars do care what you think of them. Celebrities really are people, too — just as self-doubting and prone to caring about others' opinions as we are. Which is precisely why Knightley doesn't look at reviews of her movies, "Unless I'm unfortunate enough to catch something by accident, which happens, and it's always a bad review."

"Always, it's amazing," laments Keira. "I will be sitting in a cafe, and I will open a random paper right to the page of the review. And then you're sucked in and go home and never want to go out again."

Ja, sometimes life can be decidedly less than flattering, and it sucks — but you just have to ruk jouself reg, give yourself a good dusting-off, and get going — celebrities and civilians alike.

More mortifying star moments, and edifying celebrity triumphs — in next week's Bitch and Famous!