"This summer evil has a new face..." and he knows what you'll be doing this summer, what you did last summer, the summer before last and even that summer when you went to see 'Battlefield Earth' and had to be coaxed off the top floor of the Ster Kinekor. Yes, every December they come upon hyped-up audiences like the ninth coming of Freddie Kruger, but invariably these blockbusters with puny plots and breathtaking budgets rake in the box-office billions.

But why do we fall for them year after year? Are we a nation of formulaic doggerel addicts, or has the dumbing down of society gone 'Dumb and Dumber'? Perhaps a list of the worst offenders will give us some pointers.

'A Knight's Tale' ($58-million at the global box office)

With apologies to the late Heath Ledger, a movie that begins with medieval partisans chanting Queen's 'We Will Rock You' is just begging for derision. Miraculously throngs of moviegoers ended up being duped by the promise of another 'Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves' but instead got a predictable yawn on horseback.

'Big Momma's House' ($117-million)

Martin Lawrence goes undercover as an obese matron in this criminally unfunny caper that had the last laugh, racking up tragically huge box-office takings. With such 'priceless' gems as Momma groaning: "These stewed prunes go right through me" while on the porcelain throne, and Lawrence delivering a baby with a turkey baster, it's difficult to gather how this washed-up comedian gets away with cinematic murder.

'Lara Croft: Tomb Raider' ($130-million)

The best part of the movie is in the trailer, where Angelina Jolie's figure can be seen in all its glory. From video game to film is never an easy transition, and Lara Croft suffers more than most. Rather get the console out and save yourself from a nonsensical storyline and very little bang for the buck.

'Wild Wild West' ($222-million)

It was supposed to be the new 'Men in Black' with director Barry Sonnenfeld and lead Will Smith reprising their successful franchise partnership. What audiences got instead was a ho-hum mix of wearisome western and Smith in long johns that could well have been conceived by Men on Crack with inexplicable continuity gaps and plot twists. Luckily for the Fresh Prince, while it may not have been an MIB III, it did end well into the black.

'Batman and Robin' ($238-million)

What with latest Batman vehicle 'The Dark Knight' going great guns on circuit, it bears the all-star cesspool that is its wonky predecessor. This money making plonker effectively ended the careers of Arnold Schwarzenegger, Alicia Silverstone and Chris O' Donell. In fact, the hapless O' Donell would be lucky to get infomercial offers after landing the part of the androgynous sidekick, complete with hernia-inducing one-liners. The script could have been written by a glue-sniffing six-year-old and completely disregarded the everyman qualities that make Batman so popular. Almost as ludicrous as the infamous moulded nipples on the batsuit.

'Meet the Fockers' ($279-million)

Ben Stiller's lead character Gaylord Focker has his name referenced about 347 times during the movie. And this is the funniest moment in this dreadful sequel that merely recycles the jokes from the outstanding original. Hoffman and De Niro must be going senile to have put their names to this.

'Armageddon' ($553-million)

In Seventh-day Adventist theology, the events of Armageddon will leave the earth desolate for the duration of the millennium. Much like 'Armageddon' the movie's plot then. It's on the list of critic Roger Ebert's most hated films:"The movie is an assault on the eyes, the ears, the brain, common sense and the human desire to be entertained" And that Aerosmith track is a synonym for nausea after being played to the bitter end… again and again.

'Transformers' ($708-million)

Megatron, Decepticon, just plain con-job here as the robot renegades from the '80s make an unwelcome debut on the big screen. Yes, your cell-phone can kill you… if you're too busy blabbing away on it to notice that eighteen-wheeler in your path. Seriously.

'Star Wars: Episodes I to III' ($924-million)

The almost 20-year wait for this chronological prequel to the cult 'Star Wars' series was the celluloid disappointment of a generation and some fans are still in mourning. One of the highest grossing films of all time, in critics' eyes, it fell on its lightsabre. Insipid and colourless, it lacked the character and adventure that made the original trilogy instant classics. Tellingly, apart from not winning any Oscars and leaving out Han Solo, it was nominated for the Razzies' Worst Picture, Worst Director, Worst Screenplay, Worst Supporting Actor, Worst Supporting Actress, Worst Screen Couple, and won the Worst Supporting Actor category with 'merchandising opportunity' Jar Jar Binks. Don't ask me about the plot, I left the cinema early to watch 'Power Rangers: The Movie' on DVD.

'Titanic' ($1.8-billion)

Titanic sank in a little under three hours. 'Titanic' the movie is well over the three-hour mark and includes Leonardo Di Caprio and Celine Dion. I'd rather knock my head against an iceberg than sit through this melodramatic waffle but it seems I'm all alone on this side. With almost $2-billion in the bank, Cameron and company should be ready to announce that sequel any day now.